I've been having a little bit of an identity/early mid-life crisis recently, I should know better but sometimes it is just too easy to get dragged down into the day to day drudgery that life can become. I am a wife and I am a mother but that doesn't mean that I should abandon myself. Should I give up the things that make my heart sing and add sparkle to my life? I love my daughter but having a baby and managing to keep her alive for the last four years (whoop go me!) shouldnt feel like my defining feature. FYI nursery teachers my name is not Lily's mom it is Holly! I love my daughter but I also love ridiculous shoes, searching for the perfect vintage dress, drinking gin and dancing til my feet bleed.
I often feel like I am caught between two worlds and I'm not really sure I belong in either. I will never be part of the mumsnet brigade but equally I have responsibilities so I can't be spontaneous and have new adventures like your average twenty something. (Seriously I require at least four weeks notice for an evening out!) People talk a lot about work life balance but never about balancing the aspects of your personal life. Is it not important to make sure that your entire life is not defined by one part of who you are?
Being a mother and retaining your identity is fucking hard, doing that and running a business is even harder! There may be days when it all just feels too much and I feel lost in a sea of demands and housework but I will never stop trying to find that balance. Yes I am a mom but aside from that I'm also a pretty god damn awesome human being. Finding the balance may be a struggle but it's got to be possible. (Please tell me it is!)
Do you ever struggle with finding a balance? How do you go about reclaiming yourself when you feel lost? Hit me up with your tips and tricks!